“I am responsible for my happiness.”
Recently while sipping my morning dose of coffee, between reviewing my endless list of responsibilities on my calendar and preparing breakfast for Marri and Coty, I realized that one of my favorite holidays-next to Thanksgiving and Christmas was quickly approaching.
Valentine’s Day grants a self-proclaimed glitter queen like me the opportunity to create sparkly, heart-shaped cards, covered in and filled with glitter. I have built a reputation off my glitter shenanigans. Many of my friends and family members have stated that when they receive a card in the mail from me, they open with extreme precaution due to the likelihood of glitter or confetti spilling everywhere.
Since the art of giving is my love language, I find joy in using materialistic and thoughtful trinkets to show my loved ones what they mean to me. However, this year was different. As Marri grows exponentially before my eyes each day, the demand of being a new mom often causes me to operate on depleted energy reservoirs.
Over the past few months, the constant state of tired that can sometimes result from parenting became my standard. Although each day with my baby is fantastic, many of my relationships suffered, including the relationship with myself. Also, caring for an infant has many times taken my attention away from my husband. Granted during our early parenting adventures, we were both in survival mode, adjusting to parenting collectively and individually, sometimes our daily routine did not leave us time for ourselves.
As women, sometimes we find it difficult to love on and pour into ourselves. We will run our bodies, our minds and our spirits ragged, pouring into others, while we go weeks, months and sadly sometimes years without focusing on ourselves.
Now, parenting is slowly becoming more natural, and I am gradually finding the time, even if it’s only 30 minutes a day, to invest in and love on me. Once my tank replenishes, I can efficiently and wholeheartedly love and care for those around me.
"When we focus on ourselves, fixing what's broken inside us and rejoicing in what isn't, life becomes simpler, more relaxed and loving" -Martha Beck
This Valentine’s Day, I am committed to showing Coty and many of my loved ones how much they mean to me. To accomplish this task, I focused on my needs and refilled my reservoir, so that I can I find the energy and motivation to love others effectively.
Once you find inner peace you will be able to serve humanity"
Join me on this journey of falling back in love with Dominique, the believer, the mommy to Marriman, wife to my sexy beast of a husband Coty, and lover of humankind. Listed below are daily practices that have helped me enhance my self-love and reclaim my time:
Daily Practices That Help Reclaim Your Time
- A healthy body yields a sharp mind. Exercise is not only great for you mentally and physically; it is a time to reinvest in your well being and release stress.
- Take yourself out to eat. This action will afford an opportunity for self-reflection, and you can take time to enjoy your meal.
- Get a manicure, a pedicure, or a massage, because a little self-pampering is the best pick me up.
- Focus on and invest in your spiritual growth. Read your devotional-reconnecting with Christ is a guaranteed way to replenish your spirit.
- Say no and sleep in. Many times for us to get extra rest we have to eliminate “extra” activities. When you are trying to find balance, it is okay to occasionally say no, even to things that sound like great opportunities. Your no may allow you to say yes to more rest and more time with your loved ones.
- Take time to acknowledge and care for your mental health.
- Make peace with your flaws- they make you perfectly imperfect.
- Work towards doing more of what you love and what brings you joy.
- Keep a gratitude journal or jot down three things you are grateful for daily. This small act will help you keep things in perspective.
- Say something kind about yourself every morning upon waking up. Positive affirmation is essential.
You are responsible for your happiness. Invest in and love on you, so that you can wholeheartedly love those around you.
Happy Valentine's Day,
Peace, Light, and Love.