“Cherish each moment because your children will never be as young as they are today.”
Today I am 38 weeks pregnant, 271 days to be exact. This job of carrying and growing another human has taken a toll on me mentally and physically. However, the blessing of being a mommy is one of God’s greatest gifts and yet the hardest jobs I have done.
This second pregnancy with all of its tribulations and life changes was much more difficult and strenuous than the first. The responsibilities of caring for a rambunctious, genuinely funny and active toddler name Marri, trying to care for my hubby, and attempting to be a good human being, has made this season of my life quite interesting. Talk about a time when life has forced me to grow tremendously.
Some days I felt like my best was barely enough. Many days, especially over the last few weeks of this pregnancy, I felt deeply depressed because did not have the energy to play with my toddler or give an ounce of extra love and attention to my husband.
Marriage and parenting is not about being this perfect representation of yourself, it is about overcoming daily struggles, and about juggling your personal and professional needs with the needs of those you love dearly. I do feel that my marriage is my number one priority because it is my ministry and it is God’s gift to my life.
My job title as mom is a close second, because, no pressure, I am preparing tiny humans to live highly functional and healthy lives in society. Something Coty and I have learned along this journey is that we set the mold for our children’s character, and our actions are like their blueprint. Parents are their kids most impressionable role models and they will always remember the life lessons you taught them, the good and the bad.
Sadly, because we are human and deeply flawed beings, some of the lessons we teach will not merit the parent of the year award. However, as long as we wake up every morning (even when exhausted and distracted) and commit wholeheartedly to this job of parenting, God will show up and give us the supernatural strength to help guide and nurture our babies.
He will provide the kind of strength you need to thrive and love another tiny human with all of your soul. To love them through blow out diapers up the back, temper tantrums in the middle of the busiest target, love yourself and them through sleep training, through the woes of breast feeding, and through them throwing all their healthy and nutritious snacks on the floor for the dog to eat.
This is the hardest yet greatest time of my life and I must learn to love every moment. Listed below are a few gems my hubby and I picked up along our path to parenting so far:
Nothing ever goes as planned and that is okay. Learn to be flexible and accept in the moment changes.
Consistency is key! Your baby thrives when you provide consistency and a schedule. This may impact your personal and professional schedule but once they are accustomed to a routine it will make life easier.
You are their role model! Everything you do they will emulate.
Time management is the key to your sanity. Your child may demand more of your time and that is normal. The family members and friends who love you will understand if you are unable to cater to them because you are caring for your spouse and child.
Balance! Before you were a parent you were a unique person. Try to find time to do a few of the things you did before your baby. These task may be as simple as a daily workout, listening to a podcast in peace, taking a solo drive, or shopping alone. Throughout every stage of parenting you have to maintain your sense of self.
Trust your instincts. Do not let the “advice” of others make you feel like you are inadequate or unprepared. You must trust your instincts and do what you know is best for your child.
Remember, your child is a gift from God. They do not physically belong to you, yet they were given to you to love and guide during their time on earth. Embrace and honor this precious gift you were awarded.
Display grace and compassion towards yourself and your spouse. Some of us will be supermom and super-dad immediately, for the other 99% of us, there is a learning curve and we have to give ourselves time to adjust.
Blessings and love from your soon to be Milfy momma of two,